Tuesday, August 31, 2010

To My Family

My blog is rife with criticisms of my family, so I'd like to take the time to acknowledge my gratefulness to my family, lest people start believing that my family has influenced me negatively. A few instances here and there cannot diminish the fact that my family loves me, and only wants what is best for me.

The Taiwan that I grew up in was a very strict society, where children my age were basically lumped together by their academic performance. It was a complete meritocracy, which has its advantages and disadvantages. Everybody was pressured to do well in school, and I was naturally not exempt from this. Everything was about success - either do it right, or don't do it at all. This motto was drilled into me since childhood, and I was only able to begin shedding it off during my first year of university.

I love my family for the discipline that they have brought me. In a time where individualistic desires and "stick-it-to-the-Man" thoughts have pervaded the thoughts of the new generation, discipline especially comes in handy. I love them for teaching me the ways of treating others as you want to be treated, because it has helped me immensely in building my network of friends and acquaintances.

Most of all, I love them for doing what they believe is right for me, even though it is always risky on their part. They punished me physically because it is the easiest way to instill discipline in a child, while taking the risk that I could grow up to hate them forever. They pushed me into my university and my major even though I wanted to do something else, because of the bright future that an ECE degree from Illinois has, even though it would put them $100,000 more into debt compared to a Canadian university. They fought with me over the issue of my sexuality, because it is a hard world out there for gay people, and they wanted me to avoid the hardships that will face me in the future.

Mom, Dad, and Jess, I appreciate everything you've done for me. My biggest wish for all of you now, is for you to stop worrying about me. You've made me into the person I am today, so that I can use the skills that you gave me to face the world on my own. It's time for you to live and enjoy your own lives, rather than helping me live mine.

It's the time to abandon rigidity and planning, for a little bit more spontaneity and discovery. Life is more enjoyable that way.

Love,

FCDH