I Hate...

I hate the fact,

that you cracked my shield and saw me vulnerable,

that I dropped my defenses and became complacent,

that I have doubts about myself and my values,

that I know nothing will probably ever happen between us.

that I am forced to rebuild my defenses and self-discipline.

that I don't understand you,

and that I don't understand myself anymore.

But most of all,

I hate the fact that I am losing the battle.

-FCDH